Monday, March 16, 2015

A Step in the Write Direction, March 16, 2015--More "Show, Don't Tell"

A Step in the Write Direction

March 16, 2015

Update: It’s been a long week—with the viewing, the beautiful honor ceremony at the Veterans Cemetery, and then the memorial service yesterday. People talk about the “new normal,” although I’m not sure anything will be “normal” anymore. But I have so much to be thankful for: 54 wonderful years of memories, a great support group of family and friends, and so many emails, Facebook comments, cards, flowers, and gifts. I thank God for all of you….Now to get caught up on everyday things: three income taxes for customers, a proofreading job coming tomorrow, and an editing job later this week.

Thought for Today: “Our Saviour kneels down and gazes upon the darkest acts of our lives. But rather than recoil in horror, he reaches out in kindness and says, 'I can clean that if you want.' And from the basin of his grace, he scoops a palm full of mercy and washes our sin” (Max Lucado, do not know the book).

Song for Today:
When grief seems more than you can bear,
Your soul weighed down with anxious care,
And you are almost tempted to despair,
Jesus whispers ‘Peace.’
            Della McChain Warren, “Jesus Whispers Peace”

Laugh for Today:
Ten Signs You Are In For A Long Sermon
1. There's a case of bottled water beside the pulpit in a cooler.
2. The pews have camper hookups.
3. You overhear the pastor telling the sound man to have a few (dozen!) extra CDs on hand to record today's sermon.
4. The preacher has brought a snack to the pulpit.
5. The preacher breaks for an intermission.
6. The bulletins have pizza delivery menus.
7. When the preacher asks the deacon to bring in his notes, he rolls in a filing cabinet.
8. The choir loft is furnished with La-Z-Boys.
9. Instead of taking off his watch and laying it on the pulpit, the preacher turns up a four-foot hour-glass.
10. The minister says, "You'll be out in time to watch the Super Bowl." But it's only September! (Gospel Greats newsletter, 2/17/15).

Writer’s Tips:                        More “Show, Don’t Tell”

Don't overuse "he said," "she said."

            Don’t always have to say “he said” or “she said.” Three ways to avoid it:

            1) Change paragraph with each speaker;

            2) Follow dialogue with action line that mentions the character, i.e., "Like my mother before me, I inherited my magic," Gwen said.  She picked up the tattered parchment.

            "Like my mother before me, I inherited my magic."  Gwen picked up the tattered parchment.

            3) Call the other person by name.  "Just be patient, Gwen."

Writer’s Digest article:

“Most beginning authors have trouble with the use of the word ‘said.’ There is no reason to shy away from ‘said’ in dialogue. After all, words are spoken, not flung, ejaculated, whipped out, proclaimed, exhaled, blatted, hissed or cried. People ‘say’ things to other.

“To show you how bizarre this can become, Dick Perry in his book One Way to Write Your Novel (Writers Digest Books) shows how riotous and ridiculous dialogue becomes when the author strains at something other than ‘said’.”

“Hilda,” he murmured, “I love you.”
“Do you, Herbert?” she breathed.
“Yes!” he thundered.
“Are you certain you love me?” she whined.
“Why?” he gasped. “Don’t you love me?”
“I love you,” she yelled.
“You do?” he hissed.
“I’ll always love you,” he alleged.
“I’m so happy,” she whimpered.
“Me, too,” he panted.”

Sometimes just “said” is enough!

 Have a good week spreading the
gospel through the printed page.

Donna Clark Goodrich

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